Rejection

Hello Dear Reader Friends.

As you know from a post last month, I’ve completed and am ready to share my latest book.  I’ve sent out my first batch of query letters to agents I love and the responses are starting to trickle in, all three rejections.  A very nice rejection, a form rejection, and a one liner.  Luckily (maybe), I’m immune to rejection.  Years of theatre will do that to you.  We get told ‘no’ on a daily basis, in varying brutal ways.

I knew this wasn’t going to be easy.  A book birthed out of the sudden death of a bestfriendparentbrother was doomed to be fucked up.  The style is not my usual, straight-forward romp, but I couldn’t help it.  The book wrote itself in a shockingly short amount of time.  I just went where it took me and so far so good.  I make everyone cry with it which is a weirdly god-like power, or at least I think so.  Now I just have to capture that elusive Agent Pokemon.  It should be noted I am the absolute worst at self promotion.  Crafting those letters is almost physically painful.  Yes, I know.  This is a subjective business.  Lots of people get rejections.  Most people won’t make it.  You can always self publish.  Yadda, yadda.

Moments like these make me lament my lack of normalcy and wish I could be happy writing romance novels for about a day before I remembered MIDNIGHT SHOW!  BOURNE! And let Jeremy Renner cure my ills.  Now I’m all better.  So here I am, back at square one, preparing to write yet another winding love story that will make the majority of people scratch their heads, I’m sure.

Should I try to ease people into my weirdness?  A gander at the tiny notebook that holds stray plot lines and future project ideas reveals pages and pages that are all skipping off into the badlands.  Coming Soon: schizophrenia, Stockholm Syndrome, and a graphic novel about Death who falls in love with a little girl.  What has happened to my brain?  Remember that Post-Apocalyptic YA I wrote (just like everyone else) that I shelved (and should probably get back to) until I could polish and make it stand out?  Only one person (that you care about) dies in that one.  Now my mind is full of monsters that eat babies and onanistic blood baths inside of stone people.  I blame video games.  Or Obama, maybe.  Wait, who are we fingering this week?

Anybody know an agent who actually wants weird stuff?  They all say they enjoy dark and strange but I need them to seriously want dark and strange.  Are you playing the agent game or are you a fan of the self publishing world?

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Words (and links) on the Week…

 Happy Friday, all!  This week went by really fast, but I find myself feeling surly and weekend-ready none-the-less.  On a good (personal) note:  I figured out my series through the end.  I’ve written the first and outlined/written a fourth of the second, but I wasn’t sure how the third was going to play out until now.  Granted, this could all change.  My characters tend to do things without my permission.  But enough blabbering about me!  On to the linking…

I’ve found this week to be very listy.  Maybe because I could only concentrate on nonsensical, highly subjective things.

First comes from the Huffington Post.  They asked readers what the most beautiful words were.  Spoiler alert: Cellar door not included.  They also asked what the most disgusting words were.  Spoiler alert: Pants?  Really?

Five books inspired by dreams.  I like this, though I knew that three out of five were dream written already.  If you know me, I have the most insane dreams.  They’re like movies.  They’re ridiculously detailed and tend to make people jealous.  My sleep is lively.  And I’ve definitely dreamed entire chapters.  Does anyone else write like this?

Ten books you should have read in high school.  I did read a lot of these in high school.  When I first clicked this “alternative” list, I expected a lot more controversy.  But alas, fairly reasonable suggestions.  Any edits, reader?

A pretty awesome NPR list:  Top 100 Sci-fi Books.  I like this list a little too much.  I’m reaching new heights of nerd as of late.  This is another reader generated voting so don’t hate NPR.

This last list, Ten Ways to Start Your Story, is for my writer friends.  I tend to get inspried when I read this silly little “helpful” articles.  Yeah, you already know this stuff, but why aren’t you doing it?!  GET TO WRITING!

News:

I read this (small) article on What the UK Riots Mean for Bookstores.  I’d like to see a longer treatment of this.  Has anyone come across something like that?  Also: I’m not surprised by the gay bashing.  Unfortunately.

I’m sure you’ve noticed by now, but I’m a ridiculous Vonnegut enthusiast.  That is followed closely by my love of Poe.  The only time I’ve ever yelled at a teacher was over Poe in college.  She was an insufferable know-it-all hater and I was right.  So there.  Anyway.  Poe’s house in Baltimore may be closing due to financial difficulty.  This depresses me. 

POE WAS A GOD DAMN GENIUS! TAKE THAT BACK OR I WILL END YOU!

I’ve never been.  I should become independently wealthy and go on a book road trip.  Anyone else in?

Publishing is up!  Horrah!  Books will never die!  I probably single handily achieved this.  I spend too much on books.  Wait, never mind.  I spend the perfect amount.

Silly (and informational):

Ever wanted to have a book party?  Here’s a recipe on making Book Candies out of chocolate and fruit leather.  Mmm…tasty knowledge…

In the way libraries are always useful, New York Public Library tweeted out this find: An Online Guide to Food Spoilage.  I tend to be a little scary when it comes to food (i.e. if I don’t vomit when I smell it, it’s so totally edible) while my husband will throw something away if it looks at him wrong.  Although technically if the food has developed sentience and can look at him, it’s probably time to go.  Anyway, if you’re like me, this is a nice resource.  not related to books or words but provided by a library so I think it counts.

Every wonder what male superheroes would look like if we sexualized them the way we do females?  Well, here you go.

And finally, in honor of the zombie trend sweeping our lives (and bookshelves), a collection of zombie paraphernalia.  Any zombie-thing you could possible wish to buy.

Replace that brain with a book, lady. It's the Zombie cure!

A strange week in links, no?

As always, a video to send you off.  (WARNING: lots of bad words.  Lots and lots.  READ A MOTHER FUCKIN’ BOOK!  See?  Bad words.)

Also: Tell me a story!

Tell me a story (3)…

Picture stories are probably the only thing I look forward to on Mondays. 

No new guidelines.  Just look at the picture and write whatever comes to mind.  We’ve had poems, first person rants, one-liners….make it as long or as short as you’d like.  In a few weeks we’re going to change it up a bit so enjoy your freedom while you can!  Check out last week’s if you haven’t already.

Think you have a photo that would make a good story?  Show me: sociableink@gmail.com  Don’t worry, you’ll get credit and a link to your website and/or blog.

Words (and links) on the Week…

I’ve collected far too many links this week so I hope you don’t really feel like working.  Although I doubt that everyone will be as fascinated by them as I am, hopefully there’s a little something for everyone.

Let’s start with silly, fun links first.

Pictures are worth a thousand words, right?  Do you miss the good ol’ days when you could trust a picture to not be photoshopped, when those thousand words were the god-honest truth?  Well, you’re probably wrong.  Photography and photographic tampering were born simultaneously it would seem.  Here’s a collection of historical photos you won’t believe aren’t real.  From that iconic Lincoln image, to Hitler, to Oprah, they have it all.

Here’s a blog with a small collection of what they consider the best closing lines in literature, with even more making an appearance in the comments section.

The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction contest has published their 2011 results.  This contest challenges people to write the worst opening lines they can think of.  It’s named after the author who first penned “It was a dark and stormy night…”  This year’s winner:

“Cheryl’s mind turned like the vanes of a wind-powered turbine, chopping her sparrow-like thoughts into bloody pieces that fell onto a growing pile of forgotten memories.”

Sue Fondrie

Oshkosh, WI

It’s a game about books!  Finally, a place where my pointless skill-set isn’t so pointless.  Plus, it’s called It Was a Dark and Stormy Night.  Ha!

In honor of shark week, here’s a (very funny) list of 20 things that kill more people than sharks.

This week in nerd-dom, Brian Michael Bendis explains the decision behind killing Peter Parker, Spiderman’s alter ego, and introduces us to Miles Morales, the new Black/Hispanic super hero.  On why he chose to incorporate a minority into one of Marvel’s biggest assets:

“Mr. Bendis said he had also taken a lesson from a black friend who told him that Spider-Man was the only superhero that other children would let him play when he was growing up. “You couldn’t see his skin color,” Mr. Bendis said the friend told him. “He was any of us, when he was in costume.”’

In author-dom:

Sylvia Plath’s novel The Bell Jar turns 40 this year, and The Poetry Foundation has an incredibly fascinating article about both the book and the article.

The New Yorker’s Alex Ross uses Oscar Wilde’s Picture of Dorian Gray,

Oh, Oscar. Only you can make me wish I was a gay man circa late 19th century...

history, and opposing view point’s on Wilde’s personality to try and flesh out the man and the myth.  A book worm or a sex-addict?  A martyr or just another celebrity icon?  Fair warning, it’s really long and occasionally a bit cerebral.  I found it it interesting but then again, I have an irrational attachment to Wilde.

In News-dom:

Apparently the House Committee pushed through a bill to record all the words we make on the internet and the clicks we click.  This scares me.

Librarians are sexy.

For my little statisticians out there, here’s a nice census of librarians from 1880-2009.  There’s an obvious decline, but it’s slowing!  Love your libraries, people.

Here we have a somewhat graphic telling of the rise and fall of Borders from the perspective of a former book-slinger.  Warning: She says ‘fuck.’

Which brings me to my next bit of news: Slaughterhouse-five has been banned.  Again.  People like this are the reason I hate people.  And Missouri.  Just kidding.  Kind of.  Expect a significantly longer rant regarding atrocities such as this next week.  (If you’re confused about my ‘fuck’ segue, that’s the general objection to SH5).

A quote that made me laugh this week:

“Your 30th birthday is an important landmark. You are now ready, after ten years of dicking around with your personal style, to select a signature lipstick. This is the lipstick that will get your through thick and thin. When you are screaming for mercy during childbirth, this is the lipstick that will be smeared across your face. When you kiss the corpses of your dead parents, this is the color that will stain their cheeks. This is the lipstick that will flow into the fine lines and wrinkles around your mouth as the death rattle grips your throat. Choosing this lipstick is a momentous task. In order to complete it, you need to be slightly drunk.” (Eccentric Glamour, Simon Doonan)

For my writer friends who are reading this instead of writing, here’s a nice little blog on The 5 Essential Story Ingredients.  It may be shit we already know, but a least this way we can pretend we’re working.  It’s related to writing after!  Also, it’s presented nicely.

Whew.  Ok.  Write me a story if you haven’t already and share you’re favorite book trailer.  And have a good weekend.  I leave you with this silly video:

Have an idea for a post, want to guest blog, or think you have a picture that would make a good photo story?  Drop me a line: sociableink@gmail.com